Monday, July 30, 2007

You Must Learn How To Die Before You Can Live!

Ours is a amalgamated up human race based on materialist ends and ego-centered accomplishments. Subsequently, it is very easy to acquire pulled into the "vortex" created by the dramatic events in our lives. We get to dwell the play of our life. The worst portion of it all is that you can travel about life your life, without the slightest thought or impression of what is truly meaningful.

I thought I had it all. I was living the dream, talking the talk, and walking the walking as they say. But I was just another individual caught up in the "worldly" ownerships and life my ain play drew the six-figure income, I had the clothes, the statute title and was portion of the "who's who." I poured my bosom and psyche into my occupation and I got the money, powerfulness and acknowledgment I so craved in return. I had made it and now what else was there left for me to accomplish?

I never noticed the trail of envious, and ego-driven people I was accumulating along the way. These were negative people, driven by green-eyed monster that would halt at nil to destruct me professionally and personally. I continued down my "path" not realizing what was going on around me.

Then, one twenty-four hours it all came tumbling down, without any thought of what was about to occur, I was called away from my business office down to a meeting, where I was subsequently accused of being dishonest and corrupt to set it mildly. I was so aghast that I couldn't speak. Before I knew what was happening, I was removed from my station and warned not to speak, compose or pass on with anyone. If I chose to ignore, the "commands" I would repent it, especially if I ever returned to my position.

My life as I new it, unraveled yarn by yarn right before my very eyes, and there was not one single eremitic thing that I could make to run up it up. Both my household and I suffered and endured public humiliation via our local newspaper and television stations. This cut like a knife with a jagged border through my being. The fact that what was written was all prevarications and insinuations did no halt the outpouring of soiled looks, disgusting words, and unkind and hurtful electronic mail sent to my household and me. This went on for an ageless Hell of 2 years.

I realized that who I was or had been was dying twenty-four hours by day. I did everything possible to throw my life together, what little I had left. Daily, my battle was to do it a good day, despite what people thought of me. Iodine prayed, I meditated, I practiced yoga, I chanted, I wrote day-to-day affirmations, I visualized, and I did every Negro spiritual thing that could possibly be done. I literally walked around, remembering the poetry in the Bible that told me to turn the other cheek. I felt numb.

Then one twenty-four hours I realized that I was not the individual that was in the media. I was not this ugly, monstrous, uncaring and oblique person. I had to allow travel of this illusion. It was at that minute that I knew I had to die. I had to mourn the loss of the individual who I once was. I surrendered and I released that individual into the achromatic light. I relinquished every spot of who I was to a higher source. I had to forgive myself and state good-bye. I had to allow this individual dice and set her spirit free. Once I did that many good things began to happen. The end of this legendary female leader came silently and sadly.

It was at that very minute that I realized I had a 2nd opportunity at life. I had escaped my ego. I began to see through new eyes. I began to have got new life with new friends and newfound love within my household and marriage. The journeying that had brought us here had awakened a new love and regard for each other. Life was beautiful, love was more than vivacious and I was becoming a new person, vivacious and healthy.

I began to emerge from my cocoon. I was learning how to dwell through the eyes of a new life here on earth. I learned to be present in all that I do, to experience with emotion and exhilaration every waking moment. To recognize that I can make anything my bosom desires and be in a topographic point of tremendous chance and great regard gave me a new apprehension of what it intends to be alive and to dwell fully.

Life is better now and so am I. Life is good, and I am happy to be portion of this new life.

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